Chelsea Skaggs Coaching

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How to Strengthen Your Marriage After Baby Through Appreciation

Bringing a new baby into the world is one of the most joyful experiences in life. But let’s be honest—it's also one of the most challenging. Between sleepless nights, shifting priorities, and the demands of caring for a little one, it’s easy for your marriage after baby to take a back seat.

As new parents, the focus naturally shifts to your baby, leaving your relationship feeling neglected. Over time, this can cause tension and lead to feelings of disconnection. But here’s a relationship goal worth prioritizing: Learning to show appreciation for your partner—even when you’re tired, stressed, and overwhelmed—can strengthen your marriage in ways that truly matter, especially after having a baby.

Why Appreciation Matters in Marriage After Baby

Once you’re in the thick of parenting, it’s easy to get stuck in the daily grind. Things like diaper changes and laundry become the main focus. But taking a moment to show gratitude for your partner can change the whole dynamic of your relationship. Research from the University of Georgia shows that couples who regularly express gratitude for each other have better relationship satisfaction and are more likely to stay together.

Marriage after baby can feel hard because your roles have shifted, and the demands are high. But when both partners feel seen, appreciated, and valued, you create a strong foundation that carries you through the rough patches.

5 Simple Ways to Show Appreciation to Your Partner

Whether you’re looking to rekindle the connection or just create better relationship habits, here are five actionable steps you can take to bring more appreciation into your marriage after baby:

1. Start a Daily Gratitude Practice

It doesn’t have to be complicated—just take five minutes each day to share something you appreciate about each other. Whether it’s noticing the small things like your partner making breakfast or their support with night feedings, the simple act of acknowledging these moments can make a world of difference. Consider keeping a shared journal or even texting each other a gratitude note throughout the day.

2. Ask Your Partner How They Want to Be Appreciated

This may seem obvious, but everyone feels love and appreciation in different ways. Take the time to ask your partner how they feel most appreciated. Some people thrive on verbal affirmations, while others may prefer acts of service or quality time. By tuning in to what they need, you’re showing that their feelings and preferences matter to you.

3. Celebrate Small Wins and Milestones

In the early stages of parenting, big celebrations might not be realistic but don’t underestimate the power of recognizing small wins. Did your partner manage to clean up the house or finally get the baby to sleep? Celebrate that! These little moments build positive energy and help both of you feel valued in the relationship.

4. Create a Culture of Appreciation in Your Home

Make appreciation part of your daily routine. Compliment your partner in front of your children, share gratitude at the dinner table, or send a thoughtful text during the workday. By doing so, you’re creating a culture of appreciation that will benefit your marriage and model healthy relationships for your children.

5. Reflect on What Might Be Holding You Back

If you’re struggling to show appreciation, it might be worth reflecting on what’s holding you back. Are you feeling overwhelmed? Resentful? These feelings are valid, but recognizing them is the first step toward improving your relationship. Once you’re aware of what’s weighing you down, you can work on communicating more openly with your partner and finding solutions together.

Why Relationship Goals Should Include More Appreciation

When we think about relationship goals, we often focus on the big things—like going on more dates, taking vacations, or achieving work-life balance. But one of the most overlooked relationship goals is simply making your partner feel appreciated daily. Especially after having a baby, small acts of appreciation become powerful tools in maintaining intimacy and connection.

Appreciation builds trust and security, which are the cornerstones of a strong relationship. It’s not about grand gestures or expensive gifts—it’s about consistently showing that you value each other.

couple hugs in modern white kitchen
Photo by Em Christine Photos

The Link Between Appreciation and Emotional Connection

When you actively express appreciation, it opens the door to deeper emotional intimacy. Your partner feels more understood, loved, and valued, which in turn creates a safe space for both of you to be vulnerable and honest. This kind of emotional connection is vital in marriage after a baby, as it strengthens the bond that holds you together during the ups and downs of parenting.

Ready to Take Your Marriage to the Next Level?

Marriage after baby doesn’t have to feel like a struggle. With a few intentional steps, you can strengthen your relationship and create a deeper sense of appreciation for each other. If you’re looking to set new relationship goals, improve communication, or simply feel more connected to your partner, relationship coaching can help.

Sometimes it takes an outside perspective to see what’s really happening beneath the surface. Coaching can offer you the tools to rebuild intimacy, improve communication, and get back on the same page as a couple.

Learn more about my coaching style and philosophy here.